Teen Peer Pressure

Parents can often lose sight of the impact they have on their children as they start into the teen years and their peer group becomes their focus. While there will be peer pressure from friends parents need to keep in mind that the teen will never forget what they have been taught, the example shown, and that they still need you to lead the way and direct them. They need to be hearing from you!
While your teen will always look to you for guidance, even when they don't act like it, peer pressure is very real and at times very difficult. So how do we guide our teens and help them navigate these choppy waters during their high school years? There are few key things we can do for them:

1. Help your teen come up with responses for typical questions. Help them have a script in their minds of what they will say when someone offers them a cigarette, alcohol, drugs, asks them to ditch school, asks them to sneak out, or pursues them sexually. Be specific and do role playing. It is proven that kids assimilate information and will put the information into action if they have done role playing. Naturally, this does not make them exempt from all peer pressure but it is an important step. Also, let your child know they can use you as a scape goat. They can always say "my parents won't let me go to the party tonight", or "my mom will die if she smells cigarette smoke on my clothes and hair". You are your teens greatest ally.
2. Teach your teen how to avoid sticky situations. Help them understand that there are certain times and places that they need to avoid so they can avoid being put in a undesirable situation. It is also a good thing to talk to your kids early on about the importance of choosing good friends. Chances are if there friends are not doing things that aren't right, your teen will not fall into them.
3. For dating it is wise to tell your teen that it is best to date in groups. This avoids sexual encounters at an age that is clearly too early. It is also good if your teen goes in a group to a party or any other function where questionable sexual behavior may arise. This will let the teens have support with one another.
4. Keep the lines of communication open with your teen. The minute you make your teen feel like they will only be in trouble that is when your teen will not come to you any longer about what is troubling them. You need your teen to know that they can turn to you no matter what the situation. They need to know that while you may not like a certain behavior or situation, you will always love them.
5. Praise your teen. Help them establish great self esteem. Compliment them on what they do right and give positive reinforcement whenever you can. If your child thinks highly of themselves it is unlikely that they will get into trouble.